I fell in love... literally...

Assalamualaikum,

I fell in love... I did... since it's quite hard for me to write here from the phone... I'm just goanna said it... I fell ultimately and indefinitely with TEACHING.... I got you there right... I fell head over heels with my new passion in teaching.... It is breathtaking and one of the best feelings in the world... I will tell you the first feelings soon enough...  It all started during my pratical teaching at subang.... It was my first teaching experience and that is where i felt  love with it.... Being with the future generations and help them in their future and life... being friends and stay connected .. the bond and what we teach is being learned and implemented... when your students said... thank you teacher... you are the best teacher ever... i wish you would not leave this school... here is a gift from us with all our hearts... we love what you did on this topic.   We love science when you teach... hearing those words make you feel like you did something good and great for these people... i hope that i can be a real teacher soon and teach my students... so that i can make a good difference in their lives... i love being a Teacher... Teacher rocks!! Until then...

Part-time author in Wattpad.... =D =D

Assalamualaikum....

Its nice to finally to blog again... Its been busy... I even can't remember when I last post up my status... or blog post... Do sorry as I will update some shortly... Its been crazy and many stops in my journey... Since I have many times and I am technically doing nothing right now... So I've started something... Let's say... A story.... I will post up a link from my story and let me know what you guys think... Hope it's a good comment since I'm just a newbie.. hehe....

Emily's One Shot

DILEMMA

Assalamualaikum and hi there again...

I am not quite sure when is the last time I publish my post here in this blog but I am sure it is years ago.. Not many things that I want to say but right now I am on my last year in University of Malaya as an undergraduate student... On this incoming Monday, I will be on my practical in a secondary school at Subang, Selangor. Got a mixed feelings about it... Scared, excited, indifferent, fun, terrified, nervous, blank and etc.. hahaha... but I will know the feeling will come when the time is come. So, while writing this post, my feeling is calm.. Considering that I am going to end my degree studies soon and will be on convocation at October 2014, if it in God's will, I will have another decision to make on my next path in my life...

A little throwback over here about my decision making.. first is after my secondary school.. i have to choose between UIA english foundation and matrics with life science... which both choice is hard to make and my heart is slightly on the UIA but I choose matrics cause at that time i was following my parents a.k.a me mum where she thought that better to take in science and if you got english course at UM then you can take the course there... I also got an offer on primary school teacher in english.. I have to decline due to my inability to cope and teach and have enough patience to interact with primary school students at that time... So, after one year in matriculation, there is another decision that I have to make which is the hardest choice so far...

One is a medical doctor course in an unknown university which to say not quite famous and I dont want to wrote the university name here while a science education course at UM... Both have good pros and cons and for me are quite balanced.. one side you got a medical course which is good and high in terms of social standings in the Malaysian world.. What do you have to say~ when you talk to all aunties and uncles and you say you are taking medicine, they would totally say "Wow!!! Doctor~ Good good.. Nanti gaji banyak bagus eyh dapat jadi doktor nanti" That is typical and normal in certain society which I will not tell in here. but the bad side is that is is not from a known university or which the university is new and unreliable in local view but still the course is in MQA qualifications which is enough to get a JOB here...

On one side is that a science teacher which in specific biology teacher or chemistry teacher in the no.1 university in Malaysia which is University of Malaya which I have chosen. The good side is that you will be learning inside no.1 university in Malaysia and around 100++th university in the world. The downside is that when talking to the aunties again the dialogue is like this..

Auntie : Ika, belajar dekat mana sekarang?
Me : Dekat UM auntie
Auntie :  Really?! Good good.. Ambil course apa ika?
Me :  Cikgu..
Auntie :  oooooo *krik krik situation*

Well, is it really that low when studying to become a teacher.. It is true that I pretty much regretted everyday when I had a hard time in UM of not choosing doctor but still i carry on and reach the final semester which is the practical.. Moral of the story here DO NOT JUDGE PEOPLE BY THEIR OCCUPATION!!!!

After reaching the final semester, I have realize that Alhamdulillah that I pick this course instead of other course which could be much worse than I am facing in UM. I learn to love to be a teacher and I learn to love to teach and giving information to my future students. I am excited to be a teacher. Even though I do not have much experience, I know by teaching, it will teach me how to be mature and not a child any longer. I am anticipating for my years to come as a teacher...

The current dilemma now is that continue to WORK or continue to STUDY? Ahah... Still, thinking and thinking.. Like my mother said just now and sometimes I quote me self

"When the time comes you will now the answer, just go with the flow"

Yeah... I just wait for the time for it to come.. =)

Mid sem break~~~

Hey there and assalamualaikum....

Today marks the start of the new mid semester break after 7 weeks inside the education faculty.... wahhhhh... I got a lot i mean ALOOOOOTTTTT of assignments..... Staying at my family restaurant doing assignments.... oh yeahhh... i forgot to tell you that my family is doing a restaurant business... will promote it soon enough... got the best chicken chop!!!! Welll........ just got tired... tht is all.. will talk again soon... bubye~

Discuss. Don't judge. Have a HEART!

Hey.. Sorry for the late update here... New semester has begun... My last pointer... Teteretet..... 3.35.. So cGPA increasing and it is 3.11...... Ok la ok la.. Got many As last sem.. But tht one C just blow it away... Maybe i am being toooo overconfident.. Tht is why... Ok... New topic.. So the new sem is coming and we r going to the EDU faculty!!!!! Learning the ways to becoming a teacher and learn a lot of thing in which science cannot teach.... About the HEART... Not like literal heart but the feelings inside ourselves which we call our inner hearts... Discuss. Dont judge. Have a heart. My lecturer said that when he teaches education psychology... That quote just now is what a Harvard University Professor always said... For me.. Tht quote is to discuss our point of view because each human has different views and diffrent thinking.... And dont judge other people view as all views in thinking has the pros and cons and lastly have a heart which have a heart in accepting the good ones in each view or suggestion suggested by students or teachers...  Tht is true and a good quote... Have a good heart ladies and gentlemen who are reading this cuz from the good heart u can have a good mind and ur life will be calm and at peace as Allah always protects the good guys who obeys His orders..... I heard one quote from one anime that I like to watch.... Eyeshield 21... I am sure u heard about Hiruma Youichi.. The captain of Deimon Devil Bats who is the ,ost cunning master of manipulation and lies but believes in his friends and team for victory... One quote that make me inspire about him is "Atsui no kokoro... Atama ga yorui" means "a fiery heart.... A cool mind".... This shows that in order to achieve something.... Have a fiery or a hot passion inside our heart but make sure to keep your head cool always so that u can think logically and brilliantly... I think all leadears should have kind of hiruma's quote as that quote can lead you to become a good leader and a teacher....

"Atsui no kokoro... Atama ga yorui "

If im not mistaken cuz my japanese are not tht good....

Ok.. I let u guys think bout it and tell me whatcha think bout it.. Hahahaha...

Till then.. See you guys again soon...

Back in UM

It has been long... I know i know tht i promise before tht i would always update the blog but i am a bit busy... Huahahaha... Actually its lazy not busy.. Just trying to find excuses.. Haha. Now i am back at UM.. Continuing my third year.. Haishhh... Feel old already.. Hehe.. Still at 12th residential college.. And now it is only my first week in UM.. So, not a lot of work yet.. I got a full 6 lab this sem... Seriously going to be tired like hell.. But, i will endure it.. My cGPA is increasing.. Alhamdulillah.. :-) :-) and i got new gadget for this raya.. Will explain in the next post.. And soon, i will tell you about my raya this year.. :-) :-).. Finally i have been to seoul garden.. Hehe.. Going to tell u the trip about it soon.. And about my mew roomate.. I knew she has been following my blog.. She is the reason i will update my post.. Hope to see you again.. Toodles.. :-) :-)

Reunion with my besties from KMPk..

After two year of my matrics just ended, i got to see my friends again... but only 5 who came... From the right, Ariff, Khalis, Dya, Me and Hanim.. Afiq is the one who is taking the pics.. =) I had a really great time with them.. A lot of story has been told.. Hopefully I got to meet them again soon.. Miss them already.. They say they got another reunion ready.. hopefully will meet them again.. weeee... next time a movie pulak... how about tht, ey?

FATE? or JODOH? LOVE? OH NO~

salam and hey....

today i'm talking something that still a sensitive issue about me... JODOH~ I'm kind of a little bit jealous with some of my friends and junior who kinda already get a BF or GF... I am really happy for them.. but i kinda thinking.. when can i found my soul mate....

Sometimes, u feel want to get married, have a family life.. having kids... spending the rest of your life with someone that u love with all of your heart.. someone that is not a family and other than Allah and Rasululllah... Someone that you can express everything to him.. that can be for you when in sickness and health.. Someone that can accept you the way you are... But, that is a dream.. I think still unseen and unthinkable.. It is hard..

Sometime, when thinking about it, my self esteem just went down the hilll.... I mean it really low... through the canyon also... But, I think i got to accept that i never found my JODOH yet.. or in other words... my SOUL MATE... I think i have accepted it... This crazy mind of mine makes me think that topic back again and again...

I am a sensitive person... That is one of my weaknesses that I am not proud of and trying to overcome it.. huhu... But, everytime i go back home..  there is that one aunty... always talking to me that how her daughter and son are beautiful and great... got a lot of hand in marriage... I am happy for her sons and daughters... I not really into it.. BUT.... if she talked about the same thing over and over again to my only face... Don't you think that is a little bit weird??

Well, come to think of it...  When i think about this issue... I always taught that Allah knew what is best for me... He loves me and I love Him with the bottom of my heart.. He knew it is still not the right time for me to meet the 'guy' yet... and I know I am not ready for the responsibility for having a family yet... Hehe...

So, to all ladies out there... If you think just like me, feeling down cause not finding a guy yet.. Dun think about it.. That means Allah just save a guy that is the most perfect for you.... I guarantee it... If you feel uncertain about the guy you were dating with... Go to Allah.. He always knew what is best for you... Remember Him and if you try hard enough to find the answer... He will always give answer for you... =)

JAPAN!!!

hahaha.... my brother promised me that i can get a holiday to japan if i got 3.0 above for my cGPA... and i did it finally... after all the blood, tears and sweat for 2 years non stop fightitng... wow.. it is really hard you know... learning at UM.... really hard... i feel like half died and then i got 3.34.... if i almost2 died maybe i get a dean.. but that is my target for next sem... a dean... i wanted it so bad.. and i aso want to get 1st class honours which is hard.. but i will try... thinking of continuing to master level.. hehehe... but cannot wait for the JAPAN.... hehehe...

i won't give up

I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily
I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make
Our differences they do a lot to teach us how to use
The tools and gifts we got yeah, we got a lot at stake
And in the end, you're still my friend at least we did intend
For us to work we didn't break, we didn't burn
We had to learn how to bend without the world caving in
I had to learn what I've got, and what I'm not
And who I am

from the lyrics of Jason Mraz- I won't give up...

When i see this lyric, i didn't think you in that lyric is the one tht i love... but i think the you is the obstacle that i needed to overcome.. everytime i read this lyric.. one think i remember is my scroll.. my degree scroll.. i wud not give up on you my scroll.. hehe..

finding inspiration

Salam and hello,

When you being a writer, it is hard to find inspiration... Tht is the trouble i am having right now... to find inspiration to write... when i look at that document, i cannot type... one word did not came out of my head.. and i now officially didn't sleep the whole night thinking how to find inspiration... i already listen to the song the can inspire me.. but pufff.... one word is not out.. hmmmm.... It is hard when you are going to write a history novel.. I can sense that my aunt is not quite confident that I would do it because i'm just a 21 year old girl.. She still think i'm too young.. but what the heck... I can do it.. But still finding it... my inspiration.. I think if i didnt get that memoir... i cnnt write anything... =(( Please pray so that i can finish my book.. hehe =)

Malaysian esp Malays in this generation

Assalamualaikum and hello guys,

This post might tick off some people if there is a people reading my post.. I am now having a semester break and right now researching about a book that I am about to write.. hearing stories from the elders and my father about the old times... how the Malay at that generation cooperate and stick together or in BM they say 'bersatu' for the Independence. Even though they are a lot of political parties but they have one target or aim that is being free from the colonization.


In my opinion, Malay these days kind of really lacking that element.. I can see that the Malay are split apart... Yes, I feel really worried and sad at the same time when I saw the politicians were arguing a matter for me is a small matter and can discuss with each other in peace. 


For example, the PTPTN issue. In my opinion, PTPTN is important for us. I tell you, we needed it. I needed it because i myself is not qualify enough for a scholarship and my parents cannot afford my living cost so where to get the money? From the sky? da~... If let say there is a free education, who would be responsible for the living cost? the residential fees? the food? my clothes? who? my parents who dun have any money? A scholarship that i not qualify enough? If you want the government to take all the responsibility, then i am being pampered... Better i sit at home doing nothing and not being productive and just dun work cuz the government will take care of it... Hello!!!! If you think like that then this government will be gone in matter of hours... 


Some of the people were complaining to the government not doing this and that but you should be shame on yourself if u just complaining about what the government cannot do. Why did i say like that? It is because my dad always told me that 

"Never ask what the country do for you but ask yourself what can you do for your country"

This quote is for someone who asks and complains to the government. I tell you if the people in a country are falling apart then the country will fall apart as well. And I love Malaysia very much... I dun want  for it to be falling apart just because the people are not being together as one...

I am sorry if this post make someone angry.. This is just my opinion..

long time no write..

hey guys,

this has been a long long long time.. almost two years since i have been written at this blog.. many have change.. i am now at University of Malaya.. Going to my 3rd year as future biology teacher... yes, a teacher, not a doctor or a pharmacist like i told you before.. i know.. a lot have changed.. but seriously.. i love it.. even though got a lot of hurdles and a lot of tests... but i met most wonderful 59 course mates that has same major as me and also with different major as well.. and we have sweet times together.. and i found 2 my closest friends one is a Chinese and another is Indian.. i think i am going to continue soon.. u going to see a lot of post.. even though my blog look terrible.. but at least i can write what i have in mind... hopefully i won't get arrested if i write something because there are going to be some sensitive issue around.. he he

I have matured.... yes i do... i learn about myself the hard way... and it hurt sometimes when someone said the bad thing about you directly to your face.. but it is better than when someone look u like u did something major wrong and u didn't know what it is....

But all of it really teach me of who i am now and what i am going to become... ^^

PSPM 2...

Exams... huk3... i think that exams here dude hard man.... i can't even have the time to think... all the papers that i have done are seriously on time.... i dont have any time to check back my ans.... so i was freaking afraid if faill all the papers man... my dreams are all shattered... but then i juz have to tawakaltualallah... thats all i can do... but then i need ur help to pray for me in order for me to be suceed.... thanks....

last day at my lec hall...

the date 26th march 2010 is where the last day i will be sitting at that lecture hall 3.... that is our lec hall group h5 lecture is situated... firstly, it is a fun experience sitting at that lec hall and i miss all of them.... my tutor h5t29 is the best after all.... alhamdulillah during both sem i didn't get the tutor that is boring.... all are cheerful and at the same time serious at their study..... their all like me.... can be fun and serious at times.... how i'm going to miss that lh....

my infinity

i look through the window

i see a cloudy day

i know something is wrong

but i look away

as i went through

the path i taken

as i were lost

with the one i close the most

i hurts me the most

to be apart with them

why am i changing

the way i am before...

i losing it

im going to deep

in the dark

in the loneliness

im crawling to get out

im waiting for a hand

to take me out of the darkness

will i make it or

will i lose forever in that darkness

of loneliness......

PSPM result is out.....

the result is already out..... huhu..... my cGPA is hmmmmmm 3.67..... nt bad for me....... but for me to become a doctor that quite hard.... thinking bout microbiologist or genetics still not sure..... heheor biomeds...... hmmmmm gotta think fast coz gotta fill the UPU form this 10th december.....

MUET harrrrddddddd

MUET writing test is really really 10 times hard...... for me lar..... i not good in English..... juz thinking of the word to arrange and more higher choice of words to think n wth i really am not good at this....... huhu...... still relieved taht all the test is over.... new sem is arriving and is really hard with all the assignments and projects and the thesis all at once making so much things to do..... huhuhu..... wish me luck....

outing with the H3T24 sem 1 09/10

juz 8th november ago i was going outing with my buddies from H3T24..... at Jaya Jusco Kinta City....... eating pizza..... playing bowling and shopping.... searching for books and handphones and juz lepaking with each other.... there are 11 of us...... think that was the last day we spend the day together as H3T24 coz they got a new h3T24 on the new sem...... that day was the most happiest dayz of my life to have fun with my bffs and my friends...... really going to miss all of them...... thinking of doing a reunion in 10 years or maybe more years..... what do you think???

New Semester.....

9th november 2009 marks the beginning of semester 2.... they reshuffle the tutors and i'm separating with all of my friends...... didnt do really quite well with the new tutor mates..... my new class is H5T29b.... they got a and b per tutor group..... really miss the tutor at semester one there are so many memories with them..... arrrggghhhh why does life have to be like this..... waiting for the pspm result.... really nerve wrecking and plus the syllabus for this sem is getting harder than ever......