Reunion with my besties from KMPk..

After two year of my matrics just ended, i got to see my friends again... but only 5 who came... From the right, Ariff, Khalis, Dya, Me and Hanim.. Afiq is the one who is taking the pics.. =) I had a really great time with them.. A lot of story has been told.. Hopefully I got to meet them again soon.. Miss them already.. They say they got another reunion ready.. hopefully will meet them again.. weeee... next time a movie pulak... how about tht, ey?

FATE? or JODOH? LOVE? OH NO~

salam and hey....

today i'm talking something that still a sensitive issue about me... JODOH~ I'm kind of a little bit jealous with some of my friends and junior who kinda already get a BF or GF... I am really happy for them.. but i kinda thinking.. when can i found my soul mate....

Sometimes, u feel want to get married, have a family life.. having kids... spending the rest of your life with someone that u love with all of your heart.. someone that is not a family and other than Allah and Rasululllah... Someone that you can express everything to him.. that can be for you when in sickness and health.. Someone that can accept you the way you are... But, that is a dream.. I think still unseen and unthinkable.. It is hard..

Sometime, when thinking about it, my self esteem just went down the hilll.... I mean it really low... through the canyon also... But, I think i got to accept that i never found my JODOH yet.. or in other words... my SOUL MATE... I think i have accepted it... This crazy mind of mine makes me think that topic back again and again...

I am a sensitive person... That is one of my weaknesses that I am not proud of and trying to overcome it.. huhu... But, everytime i go back home..  there is that one aunty... always talking to me that how her daughter and son are beautiful and great... got a lot of hand in marriage... I am happy for her sons and daughters... I not really into it.. BUT.... if she talked about the same thing over and over again to my only face... Don't you think that is a little bit weird??

Well, come to think of it...  When i think about this issue... I always taught that Allah knew what is best for me... He loves me and I love Him with the bottom of my heart.. He knew it is still not the right time for me to meet the 'guy' yet... and I know I am not ready for the responsibility for having a family yet... Hehe...

So, to all ladies out there... If you think just like me, feeling down cause not finding a guy yet.. Dun think about it.. That means Allah just save a guy that is the most perfect for you.... I guarantee it... If you feel uncertain about the guy you were dating with... Go to Allah.. He always knew what is best for you... Remember Him and if you try hard enough to find the answer... He will always give answer for you... =)

JAPAN!!!

hahaha.... my brother promised me that i can get a holiday to japan if i got 3.0 above for my cGPA... and i did it finally... after all the blood, tears and sweat for 2 years non stop fightitng... wow.. it is really hard you know... learning at UM.... really hard... i feel like half died and then i got 3.34.... if i almost2 died maybe i get a dean.. but that is my target for next sem... a dean... i wanted it so bad.. and i aso want to get 1st class honours which is hard.. but i will try... thinking of continuing to master level.. hehehe... but cannot wait for the JAPAN.... hehehe...

i won't give up

I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily
I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make
Our differences they do a lot to teach us how to use
The tools and gifts we got yeah, we got a lot at stake
And in the end, you're still my friend at least we did intend
For us to work we didn't break, we didn't burn
We had to learn how to bend without the world caving in
I had to learn what I've got, and what I'm not
And who I am

from the lyrics of Jason Mraz- I won't give up...

When i see this lyric, i didn't think you in that lyric is the one tht i love... but i think the you is the obstacle that i needed to overcome.. everytime i read this lyric.. one think i remember is my scroll.. my degree scroll.. i wud not give up on you my scroll.. hehe..

finding inspiration

Salam and hello,

When you being a writer, it is hard to find inspiration... Tht is the trouble i am having right now... to find inspiration to write... when i look at that document, i cannot type... one word did not came out of my head.. and i now officially didn't sleep the whole night thinking how to find inspiration... i already listen to the song the can inspire me.. but pufff.... one word is not out.. hmmmm.... It is hard when you are going to write a history novel.. I can sense that my aunt is not quite confident that I would do it because i'm just a 21 year old girl.. She still think i'm too young.. but what the heck... I can do it.. But still finding it... my inspiration.. I think if i didnt get that memoir... i cnnt write anything... =(( Please pray so that i can finish my book.. hehe =)

Malaysian esp Malays in this generation

Assalamualaikum and hello guys,

This post might tick off some people if there is a people reading my post.. I am now having a semester break and right now researching about a book that I am about to write.. hearing stories from the elders and my father about the old times... how the Malay at that generation cooperate and stick together or in BM they say 'bersatu' for the Independence. Even though they are a lot of political parties but they have one target or aim that is being free from the colonization.


In my opinion, Malay these days kind of really lacking that element.. I can see that the Malay are split apart... Yes, I feel really worried and sad at the same time when I saw the politicians were arguing a matter for me is a small matter and can discuss with each other in peace. 


For example, the PTPTN issue. In my opinion, PTPTN is important for us. I tell you, we needed it. I needed it because i myself is not qualify enough for a scholarship and my parents cannot afford my living cost so where to get the money? From the sky? da~... If let say there is a free education, who would be responsible for the living cost? the residential fees? the food? my clothes? who? my parents who dun have any money? A scholarship that i not qualify enough? If you want the government to take all the responsibility, then i am being pampered... Better i sit at home doing nothing and not being productive and just dun work cuz the government will take care of it... Hello!!!! If you think like that then this government will be gone in matter of hours... 


Some of the people were complaining to the government not doing this and that but you should be shame on yourself if u just complaining about what the government cannot do. Why did i say like that? It is because my dad always told me that 

"Never ask what the country do for you but ask yourself what can you do for your country"

This quote is for someone who asks and complains to the government. I tell you if the people in a country are falling apart then the country will fall apart as well. And I love Malaysia very much... I dun want  for it to be falling apart just because the people are not being together as one...

I am sorry if this post make someone angry.. This is just my opinion..

long time no write..

hey guys,

this has been a long long long time.. almost two years since i have been written at this blog.. many have change.. i am now at University of Malaya.. Going to my 3rd year as future biology teacher... yes, a teacher, not a doctor or a pharmacist like i told you before.. i know.. a lot have changed.. but seriously.. i love it.. even though got a lot of hurdles and a lot of tests... but i met most wonderful 59 course mates that has same major as me and also with different major as well.. and we have sweet times together.. and i found 2 my closest friends one is a Chinese and another is Indian.. i think i am going to continue soon.. u going to see a lot of post.. even though my blog look terrible.. but at least i can write what i have in mind... hopefully i won't get arrested if i write something because there are going to be some sensitive issue around.. he he

I have matured.... yes i do... i learn about myself the hard way... and it hurt sometimes when someone said the bad thing about you directly to your face.. but it is better than when someone look u like u did something major wrong and u didn't know what it is....

But all of it really teach me of who i am now and what i am going to become... ^^

PSPM 2...

Exams... huk3... i think that exams here dude hard man.... i can't even have the time to think... all the papers that i have done are seriously on time.... i dont have any time to check back my ans.... so i was freaking afraid if faill all the papers man... my dreams are all shattered... but then i juz have to tawakaltualallah... thats all i can do... but then i need ur help to pray for me in order for me to be suceed.... thanks....

last day at my lec hall...

the date 26th march 2010 is where the last day i will be sitting at that lecture hall 3.... that is our lec hall group h5 lecture is situated... firstly, it is a fun experience sitting at that lec hall and i miss all of them.... my tutor h5t29 is the best after all.... alhamdulillah during both sem i didn't get the tutor that is boring.... all are cheerful and at the same time serious at their study..... their all like me.... can be fun and serious at times.... how i'm going to miss that lh....

my infinity

i look through the window

i see a cloudy day

i know something is wrong

but i look away

as i went through

the path i taken

as i were lost

with the one i close the most

i hurts me the most

to be apart with them

why am i changing

the way i am before...

i losing it

im going to deep

in the dark

in the loneliness

im crawling to get out

im waiting for a hand

to take me out of the darkness

will i make it or

will i lose forever in that darkness

of loneliness......

PSPM result is out.....

the result is already out..... huhu..... my cGPA is hmmmmmm 3.67..... nt bad for me....... but for me to become a doctor that quite hard.... thinking bout microbiologist or genetics still not sure..... heheor biomeds...... hmmmmm gotta think fast coz gotta fill the UPU form this 10th december.....

MUET harrrrddddddd

MUET writing test is really really 10 times hard...... for me lar..... i not good in English..... juz thinking of the word to arrange and more higher choice of words to think n wth i really am not good at this....... huhu...... still relieved taht all the test is over.... new sem is arriving and is really hard with all the assignments and projects and the thesis all at once making so much things to do..... huhuhu..... wish me luck....

outing with the H3T24 sem 1 09/10

juz 8th november ago i was going outing with my buddies from H3T24..... at Jaya Jusco Kinta City....... eating pizza..... playing bowling and shopping.... searching for books and handphones and juz lepaking with each other.... there are 11 of us...... think that was the last day we spend the day together as H3T24 coz they got a new h3T24 on the new sem...... that day was the most happiest dayz of my life to have fun with my bffs and my friends...... really going to miss all of them...... thinking of doing a reunion in 10 years or maybe more years..... what do you think???

New Semester.....

9th november 2009 marks the beginning of semester 2.... they reshuffle the tutors and i'm separating with all of my friends...... didnt do really quite well with the new tutor mates..... my new class is H5T29b.... they got a and b per tutor group..... really miss the tutor at semester one there are so many memories with them..... arrrggghhhh why does life have to be like this..... waiting for the pspm result.... really nerve wrecking and plus the syllabus for this sem is getting harder than ever......

fever strikes me again.....

i'm having a fever but no flu or cough just an increase of the temp..... maybe i'll be ok haha.... just cant wait to get back.... 2 days more to go...... i'm going back to kmpk my college and start a new semester if i could make it coz never got the result yet..... but if i goin to make it new sem means new life for me like a rebirth of my life hehe.....

jalan-jalan....

today i'm going out with my cousins and found another cousin haha seem the world is very small for me..... should be that today i'm going out with my best friend today but what she didnt even showed up..... it make me sad but not angry..... i'm never benn too angry except for myself and hey help to forget him hehe....

marriage ceremony...

today is my cousins wedding reception.... alhamdulillah everything went smoothly....the guests all got their foods and everything is alright... my friend juz send me a belated birthday wish..is alright as long as my friend give me thats enough for me hehe....one more week to go until i'm coming back to the KMPk...a new sem a new life for me but the roomates doesnt change at all...... hopefully can cope with that haha.....juz worried about this incoming muet hopefully i can do it amin..... and please pray so that i can get band 4 and above hehe....

he sent me my birthday wishes

omg..... he sent to me my birthday wishes..... i couldnt believe it... at the moment there i thought he wouldnt sent me one but still he did hehe...... my crush sent me my birthday wishes.... the most happiest birthday ever... but still i never believe the true wonders of birthdays..... for me it reminds me more of my existence which that i'm greatful of..... haha.... stilll could it be more special while there is 45 more minutes left at my clock..... who wonders....

sad....

i've been waiting for their birthday wishes but still it didn't came...... waiting and waiting still it breaks my heart to wait for them huhu...... why did i even bother to wait for them but still i love both of them hahaha weird right..... my my life is full of that....

i miss you....

wow... its a long time since i'm updating this blog huhu..... well anyways didnt get the ipg interview... hmmmm my cousin is getting married ahhhh so happy for them n today is my birthday..... my 18th birthday..... puzzled actually now that i'm 18 years old.... getting older day by day.... n confused right now...... no is the end term holidays and the incoming MUET arghhh don't fweel like studying right now and well i think i'm in love but which one maybe is a he or this he huh.....it bugs me really haha..... now time to think of it im alone in this house uhuhuhu thats really sad.....